SPORTS OF ALL SORTS

 WOW! What a playoff game last night between the Dodgers and the Cardinals with the end coming on a walk-off home run by CHRIS TAYLOR who had been 9 for his last 72. And now on to San Francisco for DA BUMS.

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I make fun of them all the time because the optics of this league are just head scratching but CONGRATULATIONS TO THE CHICAGO SKY as they head to the WNBA finals for the second time in team history. They await the winner of the Phoenix-Las Vegas series and that will begin Sunday.

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I told you this would happen! ANDREW WIGGINS of the Golden State Warriors suddenly got vaccinated when he realized what he was about to lose in salary. I can imagine the conversation when the mother of his two kids heard about his refusal and said, "WHAAAAT? You get your black ass over to Walmart right now and get the shot! I ain't missing out on $450,000 every time you have a home game!" Wiggins, of course, is now pontificating that he "was forced" to get the shot. I imagine so.

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THE CHICAGO WHITE SOX return to the playoffs against the cheating garbage can banging HOUSTON ASTROS in a best of 5 series that begins THIS AFTERNOON at 3 p.m. and you know that most baseball fans will be rooting against the Astros, who screwed the Dodgers out of the championship in 2017 by cheating with a bizarre signaling system. How about we start it of by burying a fastball in Jose Altuve's ribs? just kidding? 😈

Let's take the SOX in 5. The Dodgers in 4. Tampa in 4. Atlanta upsets the Brewers.

LET'S PLAY SOME BASEBALL!

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Speaking of being forced to do something, I think VILLAGE IDIOT MATT NAGY got a phone call from the ivory tower and was instructed to 'cut the bullshit' if you want to stay employed and moments later, he changed his stance on who was the starting quarterback. Just 48 hours earlier, he had emphatically stated that ANDY DALTON is the #1 QB if healthy but mysteriously changed his mind Wednesday. Look for Dalton's bone bruise to last unless Fields is unable to play. Nagy is such a mutt. DEAD MAN WALKING.

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For those of you who are old enough, there was a time when Chicago's MARSHALL HIGH SCHOOL was the 'run & gun' team for the ages and defense was something that happened by mistake as the COMMANDOS regularly ran people out of the gym. Well, it appears that BILLY DONOVAN'S CHICAGO BULLS are following that model in an effort to qualify for the NBA playoffs as they fly down the court and put up shots in less than 10 seconds. For you younger fans, think UNLV back in the 90's. A great way to play ball but somebody better rebound.....EVERY TIME.

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I heard a rumor that upcoming free agent COREY SEAGER of the Dodgers is looking at the CUBS. Why in the name of insanity would anyone want to go from the penthouse to a real smelly outhouse? It makes no sense to throw your career away by signing with a team that won't see .500 for the next 4 years. And on the flip side, the 27 year old Seager will be looking for at least 20 million a year and a four year deal. Makes no sense.

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Finally, a sad goodbye to comedian/sports bettor NORM MACDONALD who made me laugh so many times with his sardonic wit and deadpan looks directly into the camera, especially while working SNL. I met Norm at the sports book in Caesars when he sat down next to me in the gallery to make his college football picks. We exchanged gambling pleasantries and I figured once he bought his tickets, he would be out of there. Wrong, Uncle Dan. He returned to his seat and had a fistful of 'free drink' tickets and asked me if I wanted a bloody Mary. Si Senor!

We had a couple of those and he continued to buy for other gamblers and before long, there were 20 guys hanging around just listening to him make us laugh. The only rule he had was when you got your second 'free' drink, you tipped the waitress ten bucks. Needless to say, that was a very happy young lady who never strayed far from our table.

He stayed two hours and all of us shared our stories about bad beats, last minute fumbles, bad calls by the referees, etc until he finally stood up and said VERY loudly, "WHAT A BUNCH OF LOSERS! I CAN'T HANG AROUND YOU ANY LONGER!!" The he gave us a quiet 'good luck' , smiling as he left the sports book.  A short footnote: The next time I ordered a drink and went to pay, the waitress informed me that Norm had left the group a HUNDRED free drink tickets but they were only good that Saturday. We did our best to use them all up but failed miserably. GOD SPEED, NORM MACDONALD.

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HAVE A GREAT WEEKEND AND ENJOY THE WEATHER!