Is this the real JAY CUTLER or an imposter left over from halloween? other than the pick six he tossed last week, he's been the best 'game manager' in the nfl this year. he seems calm & efficient and his qb rating of 95.3 has never been higher. let's get one thing straight...he's never going to be AARON RODGERS or TOM BRADY but this version of jay eliminates most of the angst from previous seasons. stay the course, jay.
the CHICAGO CUBS are listed as the favorite to win the 2016 world series with the DODGERS, ROYALS, BLUE JAYS, METS and NATIONALS right behind, 11-1 on your money. feeling lucky, north side sewer rats? take some of the money you normally spend on cocaine and twelve dollar beers in wrigleyville and invest in your boys in blue.
but beware the ugly monster known as supply & demand: cub fans were ecstatic over their success this past season but the season ticket invoices arrived last week and the rats learned all about the price of that success. TEN PERCENT was the average bump but most fans are going to shrug their shoulders and write the check because they think ten percent isn't too bad. well, not so fast, loyal fan.
imagine that you've been a long time ticket holder with seats in the reserved terrace down the left field line by the bullpen. totally crappy seats as are most at wrigley BUT the cubs have decided to designate those as CORNER BOX SEATS so your invoice went up 40% !!!! that's like buying a chevy neon and then getting billed for a corvette except NOTHING CHANGED on the car. ah, the friendly confines.
the cubs are also now figuring the secondary resale market as part of their formula on what to charge the regular season ticket holders. "tickets are being sold for four & five times their value so we take that into consideration," said COLIN FAULKNER, vp of sales.
so SCALPERS are determining your everyday prices. just curious....if you never scalp your tickets, do they give you a discount? how bad are ticket prices for real? wellllll, a bleacher seat is now averaging forty bucks and on "premium" games (designated by the cubs) you'll pay SIXTY FIVE DOLLARS to sit in the bleachers. WHAT????????
don't like that cubs bet at 11-1? how about the CHICAGO BEARS at 115-1 to win the super bowl THIS year. ten bucks gets you back over eleven grand.
what the hell is wrong with the green bay packers? three bad losses in a row including yesterday to the lowly lions IN green bay.
say good-bye to first ballot hall of famer PEYTON MANNING, who tore the plantar fascia, which is the ligament that connects the heel to the toes. already slow as a sloth, manning now has to think seriously about hanging them up rather than risk major injury by returning as a sitting duck. big guy, you have nothing left to prove.
moving along.....now DERRICK ROSE (aka MR. SOFTEE) says it might be three more months of double vision that conveniently 'comes and goes' while he's playing. talk about covering your butt for the many bad nights to come from a fading superstar. but if that's the case according to rose, then a 35% shooter shouldn't be on the floor at crunch time, right?
and finally.......is it just me that thinks the government has bigger problems than wasting their time & money investigating fantasy football companies like DRAFT KINGS? it seems like such a waste. tax it and move on.
ok, that's it for now. have a good week.
Monday, November 16, 2015
Friday, November 13, 2015
NOTHING BUT GOOD NEWS
There's so much nasty going on that i thought i would ease into the holiday season with a short column featuring nothing but good news in the world.
Ya gotta love it when technology works to clean up the world. "jihadi john" was lit up by a united states drone in syria and sent to the promised land thursday night. you might remember john as the isis terrorist who cut the heads of numerous jounalists and media members from around the world and recorded the executions before releasing the video on the internet. "a direct hit and no one else was injured" according to a government official. have a nice day, john.
you like country star DIERKS BENTLEY? well, you'll like him a lot more now. while dining at a local restaurant in chicago wednesday night, he noticed a young woman sobbing at one of the tables in the corner. the waiter explained she worked there part-time but was being forced to drop out of school because of the budget deadlock in illinois and wouldn't be able to finish her last three semesters and get her teaching degree. bentley went over and introduced himself and sat with her for a half hour and then provided tickets & limo service for his veterans day concert. and just to make her day even more, he paid her tuition at the college she's attending for the next year. nice guy.
here's a holiday gift for the family (but probably not for pre-high schoolers. "A CHRISTMAS CAROL" arrives at the goodman theatre on november 14 and runs thru december 27. the classic about ebenezer scrooge runs less than two hours and the goodman is a very nice theatre to watch a play. tickets start at just twenty-five dollars.
medical marijuana became legal in illinois on monday and all day, i thought it was smoke from burning leaves in the air all day.
how was that? did you smile in your heart at least once? then the column was worth it! have a good weekend.
Ya gotta love it when technology works to clean up the world. "jihadi john" was lit up by a united states drone in syria and sent to the promised land thursday night. you might remember john as the isis terrorist who cut the heads of numerous jounalists and media members from around the world and recorded the executions before releasing the video on the internet. "a direct hit and no one else was injured" according to a government official. have a nice day, john.
you like country star DIERKS BENTLEY? well, you'll like him a lot more now. while dining at a local restaurant in chicago wednesday night, he noticed a young woman sobbing at one of the tables in the corner. the waiter explained she worked there part-time but was being forced to drop out of school because of the budget deadlock in illinois and wouldn't be able to finish her last three semesters and get her teaching degree. bentley went over and introduced himself and sat with her for a half hour and then provided tickets & limo service for his veterans day concert. and just to make her day even more, he paid her tuition at the college she's attending for the next year. nice guy.
here's a holiday gift for the family (but probably not for pre-high schoolers. "A CHRISTMAS CAROL" arrives at the goodman theatre on november 14 and runs thru december 27. the classic about ebenezer scrooge runs less than two hours and the goodman is a very nice theatre to watch a play. tickets start at just twenty-five dollars.
medical marijuana became legal in illinois on monday and all day, i thought it was smoke from burning leaves in the air all day.
how was that? did you smile in your heart at least once? then the column was worth it! have a good weekend.
Monday, November 9, 2015
THE JUNGLE ROARS AGAIN
I just don't understand. no matter how bad your life is going, no matter how angry you are and no matter how much you hate a rival gang member...........what kind of animal lures a nine year old boy into an alley and assassinates him? nine years old. TYSHAWN LEE was a third grader. exactly how dangerous was he to the other gang? well, he wasn't dangerous at all but his gang banging father is very active in gang activity and the jungle gangs have now declared 'open season' on rival gang members AND THEIR FAMILIES. doesn't that send a shiver down your spine?
and there's no doubt that the neighborhood would band together and point out the shooter, right? sorry, suburban folks but that's not how it works in the jungle. everyone has become a turtle or an ostrich and didn't see anything. even a $35,000 reward hasn't been enough to bring a turtle out of it's shell. FYI--a chicago p.d. friend of mine says that MOST of the offered rewards go unclaimed which is incredible when you figure the average family income in the jungle is less than $10,000 per family. (not counting welfare benefits).
but surely the father, gang member PIERRE STOKES would help the police find the killer or at least give them a likely shooter from the other game. uh, no. stokes' response to two requests for interview was EXACTLY as follows: "why dey got to do me like dat? i got nuttin to say to da po-po. i ain't no banger. why dey wastin time talkin to me when dey could be lookin for da killers my son."
two days after the murder, police executed a search warrant at a south side apartment where stokes, currently out on bond for a gun charge, was found eating pizza and smoking marijuana with friends. and i quote again: "so we smokin dope and chillin. waddup with dat? i got court in the morning and now dey rassin' me instead of gettin the killers. dey got to loosen up wid me and pull da noose tighter on someone else cuz i got nuttin to say."
now if this is the attitude of the father and the neighborhood together, is it any surprise when non-jungle people just turn the page of the newspaper without reading the murder stories? they see the headline, shake their head and turn the page. again and again and again.
the next day a neighborhood shrine to the slain child was burned down by an unknown arsonist. ready to talk yet, folks? this is getting closer & closer to your homes and families.
just to wrap it up for this round, here are the stats from the last 5 days in the jungle:
and there's no doubt that the neighborhood would band together and point out the shooter, right? sorry, suburban folks but that's not how it works in the jungle. everyone has become a turtle or an ostrich and didn't see anything. even a $35,000 reward hasn't been enough to bring a turtle out of it's shell. FYI--a chicago p.d. friend of mine says that MOST of the offered rewards go unclaimed which is incredible when you figure the average family income in the jungle is less than $10,000 per family. (not counting welfare benefits).
but surely the father, gang member PIERRE STOKES would help the police find the killer or at least give them a likely shooter from the other game. uh, no. stokes' response to two requests for interview was EXACTLY as follows: "why dey got to do me like dat? i got nuttin to say to da po-po. i ain't no banger. why dey wastin time talkin to me when dey could be lookin for da killers my son."
two days after the murder, police executed a search warrant at a south side apartment where stokes, currently out on bond for a gun charge, was found eating pizza and smoking marijuana with friends. and i quote again: "so we smokin dope and chillin. waddup with dat? i got court in the morning and now dey rassin' me instead of gettin the killers. dey got to loosen up wid me and pull da noose tighter on someone else cuz i got nuttin to say."
now if this is the attitude of the father and the neighborhood together, is it any surprise when non-jungle people just turn the page of the newspaper without reading the murder stories? they see the headline, shake their head and turn the page. again and again and again.
the next day a neighborhood shrine to the slain child was burned down by an unknown arsonist. ready to talk yet, folks? this is getting closer & closer to your homes and families.
just to wrap it up for this round, here are the stats from the last 5 days in the jungle:
8 dead, including tyshawn lee and an 89 year old woman
who was set on fire when she walked in on a burlgary at her home.
13 wounded, ranging in age from 17 to 48 including 3 females.
they live by and die by different rules. violence solves everything. if you're in the city and you're not sure of your non-stop destination, then MADISON STREET should be as far south as you go. don't become a victim of the jungle.
Saturday, November 7, 2015
SPORTS ODDS & ENDS
Do you think NEW YORK METS second baseman DANIEL MURPHY understands now what a fickle mistress major league baseball is? murphy was king of the world during the NLCS sweep over the hapless cubs, hitting .529 on 9 for 17 with four homers, a double and six ribbies which brought him a well deserved MVP award for that four game series.
and then the worm turned and the world series madam made murphy look like a little leaguer as he garnered just 3 singles over five games and batted .150 with zero rbi's plus two HUGE errors on simple ground balls to turn the tide of two games in favor of the royals. and that's what makes baseball the game that it is.
DERRICK ROSE (aka mr. softee) has come up with the PERFECT EXCUSE for poor play and the excuse is good for the entire season. "i have double vision.... sometimes" said the master of candyassdom. how perfect is that? if he scores 29 points like he did thursday night against OKC, then "i was feeling good and had no problems" is the statement from his camp but if he scores less than ten points three games in a row? "my vision isn't perfect so i try to contribute in other ways." WHAT A LOAD OF CRAP.
but the worst part of this is rose's MONSTER CONTRACT so he's untradeable. a declining former superstar who's not even ranked in the top 15 guards in the NBA making TWENTY MILLION a year. and we have him for two more years. yay!
the WHITE SOX made the final move to say good-bye to that piece of garbage JEFF SAMARDZIJA by offering him a one year contract in the hope that he turns it down so they can get a compensatory draft pick. with the sox luck, the shark will say yes to the offer.
and finally, PATRICK KANE is off the hook and the case is closed. no, kane won't be suing his accuser for slander because that would mean that kane would be subject to a deposition UNDER OATH and the opposition attorneys can pretty much ask you anything they want about your past life including sexual experiences, drunken behavior, arrests, complaints, rehab and and all sorts of good stuff. and that's why this matter is done and will stay done.
HAVE A GREAT WEEKEND!
and then the worm turned and the world series madam made murphy look like a little leaguer as he garnered just 3 singles over five games and batted .150 with zero rbi's plus two HUGE errors on simple ground balls to turn the tide of two games in favor of the royals. and that's what makes baseball the game that it is.
DERRICK ROSE (aka mr. softee) has come up with the PERFECT EXCUSE for poor play and the excuse is good for the entire season. "i have double vision.... sometimes" said the master of candyassdom. how perfect is that? if he scores 29 points like he did thursday night against OKC, then "i was feeling good and had no problems" is the statement from his camp but if he scores less than ten points three games in a row? "my vision isn't perfect so i try to contribute in other ways." WHAT A LOAD OF CRAP.
but the worst part of this is rose's MONSTER CONTRACT so he's untradeable. a declining former superstar who's not even ranked in the top 15 guards in the NBA making TWENTY MILLION a year. and we have him for two more years. yay!
the WHITE SOX made the final move to say good-bye to that piece of garbage JEFF SAMARDZIJA by offering him a one year contract in the hope that he turns it down so they can get a compensatory draft pick. with the sox luck, the shark will say yes to the offer.
and finally, PATRICK KANE is off the hook and the case is closed. no, kane won't be suing his accuser for slander because that would mean that kane would be subject to a deposition UNDER OATH and the opposition attorneys can pretty much ask you anything they want about your past life including sexual experiences, drunken behavior, arrests, complaints, rehab and and all sorts of good stuff. and that's why this matter is done and will stay done.
HAVE A GREAT WEEKEND!
my thoughts
I really don't know what to say about the mess in fox lake but as someone who worked the streets as a police officer for twenty-five years, i can tell you that words like 'betrayed' 'disgusted' and 'embarrassed' come to my mind frequently. a lot has been written about joe gliniewicz and and his family but believe me, there's more to come so i'll leave that to the daily scribes
i was no saint patrolling the streets and i did what i had to do dealing with the maggots who ruined honest people's lives on a daily basis but as i saw it, my job was to protect the law abiding citizens of the town from that element. period.
did people complain about me? absolutely. did the bad guys say i was too physical with them? yep. did i put resisters in need of medical attention? most certainly. did i tell the habitual criminals that it would be in their best interest health wise to move out of town? right again BUT i never asked for or received anything from a local business person and i can honestly tell you i never took a dime from anyone. NOT A DIME. and i'm proud of that because being an honest cop is sometimes all that keeps you going when things get bad on the job.
in closing, i want to offer my condolences to all of the honest police officers in lake county who put their lives on the line every day because what's been printed this week has cast an unwarranted shadow on them and will for years to come.
memo to the newer officers in fox lake: move on. take a job with another department because the stink from this incident will never wash off and you'll be constantly reminded of how dishonest you are, how you shake down business owners, how you drink & drive, how you steal money and take bribes and how you're a dirtbag just like the criminals. get used to it.
now, none of that will be true but you'll never be able to defend yourself in your own town because PERCEPTION IS REALITY to many people. and in this case, you can thank joe gliniewicz for that. that's his legacy to law enforcement.
i was no saint patrolling the streets and i did what i had to do dealing with the maggots who ruined honest people's lives on a daily basis but as i saw it, my job was to protect the law abiding citizens of the town from that element. period.
did people complain about me? absolutely. did the bad guys say i was too physical with them? yep. did i put resisters in need of medical attention? most certainly. did i tell the habitual criminals that it would be in their best interest health wise to move out of town? right again BUT i never asked for or received anything from a local business person and i can honestly tell you i never took a dime from anyone. NOT A DIME. and i'm proud of that because being an honest cop is sometimes all that keeps you going when things get bad on the job.
in closing, i want to offer my condolences to all of the honest police officers in lake county who put their lives on the line every day because what's been printed this week has cast an unwarranted shadow on them and will for years to come.
memo to the newer officers in fox lake: move on. take a job with another department because the stink from this incident will never wash off and you'll be constantly reminded of how dishonest you are, how you shake down business owners, how you drink & drive, how you steal money and take bribes and how you're a dirtbag just like the criminals. get used to it.
now, none of that will be true but you'll never be able to defend yourself in your own town because PERCEPTION IS REALITY to many people. and in this case, you can thank joe gliniewicz for that. that's his legacy to law enforcement.
Monday, November 2, 2015
CATCHING UP ON EVERYTHING
congrats to the KANSAS CITY ROYALS for a great run to the world championship. coming from behind EIGHT times in the playoffs showed heart and talent, which is a combination only owned by the blackhawks in chicago but sorely missed in all the other venues in the windy city. the royals are a fun team to watch and they don't seem to have any weaknesses so look for them in october for a few years. (p.s. their normal closer was out with an injury but their bullpen was still lights out.)
and special props to ALEX RIOS, who after 12 years of playing on some pretty bad teams finally grabbed the brass ring. enjoy.
historical note: the most dominant post season performance this century is still the 2005 CHICAGO WHITE SOX, who steamrolled the opposition and went 11-1 on the way to the WORLD SERIES CHAMPIONSHIP. just sayin.......
the story of DON MATTINGLY is a confusing one. he takes over a bad dodger team in 2011 and during his five year tenure was never under .500, won three consecutive division titles and had an overall winning percentage of 55% but gets dumped. why? read on.
there's a very strong story going around that mattingly's decision to pitch CLAYTON KERSHAW instead of fully rested cy young candidate ZACH GRIENKE in game 1 against the mets sealed his fated. greinke was apparently livid at the snub and the waters were muddied even more when kershaw lost his game and greinke won game 2. a baseball lifer said, "mattingly's decision changed the entire dynamics of the series because if your strongest pitcher wins the first game, all of the pressure falls on the mets and not kershaw. the fans would have been revved up and kershaw has great killer instinct."
after the dodger elimination, greinke immediately opted out of the final three years of his contract and became a FREE AGENT plus there was a 'him or me' conversation with the dodger brass. the opt-out was expected for business reasons but turning in your papers 45 minutes after elimination sends a message. so mattingly goes bye-bye and the dodgers can only hope that greinke calms down and re-signs because losing the best pitcher in the national league would not sit well with the fans.
it's hard to even talk about the bears. they may have a great coaching staff but when most of your roster is filled with cast offs from other teams, you're looking at a minimum of three years to throw out the garbage and rebuild your team. eventually, you'll have enough draft choices and free agent signings to right the ship but it ain't happening overnight. p.s. coach JOHN FOX turns 61 during the off season and has a history of heart problems. how much coaching time does he have left?
is this the week PATRICK KANE begins to breathe normally again?
gotta run. have a great week
and special props to ALEX RIOS, who after 12 years of playing on some pretty bad teams finally grabbed the brass ring. enjoy.
historical note: the most dominant post season performance this century is still the 2005 CHICAGO WHITE SOX, who steamrolled the opposition and went 11-1 on the way to the WORLD SERIES CHAMPIONSHIP. just sayin.......
the story of DON MATTINGLY is a confusing one. he takes over a bad dodger team in 2011 and during his five year tenure was never under .500, won three consecutive division titles and had an overall winning percentage of 55% but gets dumped. why? read on.
there's a very strong story going around that mattingly's decision to pitch CLAYTON KERSHAW instead of fully rested cy young candidate ZACH GRIENKE in game 1 against the mets sealed his fated. greinke was apparently livid at the snub and the waters were muddied even more when kershaw lost his game and greinke won game 2. a baseball lifer said, "mattingly's decision changed the entire dynamics of the series because if your strongest pitcher wins the first game, all of the pressure falls on the mets and not kershaw. the fans would have been revved up and kershaw has great killer instinct."
after the dodger elimination, greinke immediately opted out of the final three years of his contract and became a FREE AGENT plus there was a 'him or me' conversation with the dodger brass. the opt-out was expected for business reasons but turning in your papers 45 minutes after elimination sends a message. so mattingly goes bye-bye and the dodgers can only hope that greinke calms down and re-signs because losing the best pitcher in the national league would not sit well with the fans.
it's hard to even talk about the bears. they may have a great coaching staff but when most of your roster is filled with cast offs from other teams, you're looking at a minimum of three years to throw out the garbage and rebuild your team. eventually, you'll have enough draft choices and free agent signings to right the ship but it ain't happening overnight. p.s. coach JOHN FOX turns 61 during the off season and has a history of heart problems. how much coaching time does he have left?
is this the week PATRICK KANE begins to breathe normally again?
gotta run. have a great week
Wednesday, October 21, 2015
NOTHING BUT CUBS
Full disclosure. I drank the cubs kool aid in early august and made a large bet on them to win the NL pennant. I thought the cubs were under priced at 8-1 and one day after making the move, the line fell to 7-1 and a week later 5-1 until the cubs settled at 3-1 in mid-september.
I thought i was in good shape after they handled the pirates and cardinals and then i got bit in the ass by the dark cloud that has hung over this franchise for over a hundred years. THEY SUCK when the spotlights go on, plain & simple. they melted like cheap candles in 2003, 2008, 2009 and again this year, with the last three being sweeps despite being heavy favorites in all of those series.
they're a nice young team that's going nowhere. i hate them with every fiber of my being and wish them nothing but the worst. stupid baseball fans, a park that smells like piss and unlimited frustration. couldn't happen to a nicer organization.
CAREER YEARS for jake arrieta, anthony rizzo, carlos rodon and justin grim. do you honestly think they'll all be that good next year?
does anyone still think kyle schwarber is a left fielder? he proved beyond a shadow of a doubt that he belongs in the american league where his defensive buffoonery will be hidden by being the designated hitter on a permanent basis. he's not playing third or first on this team and he's way too awkward to be a full time catcher. soooooooooo, hello american league.
twelve players become unrestricted free agents including austin jackson, dexter fowler, chris denorfia, clayton richards and trevor cahill. they're in dire need of bullpen help and they lack pitching in the minors so it's time to play 'let's make a deal' with some of their prospects.
they obviously need a stud starter and those available are free agent pitchers david price, zach greinke (who's really pissed that kershaw got the ball instead of him in game 1 against the mets) jordan zimmerman and yovani gallardo. if you want to play with the big boys, you'll need 200-250 million for david price but after blowing 155 on 12-10 jon lester, the cubs might think twice.
good riddance to the 2015 cubs. and kiss my ass.
I thought i was in good shape after they handled the pirates and cardinals and then i got bit in the ass by the dark cloud that has hung over this franchise for over a hundred years. THEY SUCK when the spotlights go on, plain & simple. they melted like cheap candles in 2003, 2008, 2009 and again this year, with the last three being sweeps despite being heavy favorites in all of those series.
they're a nice young team that's going nowhere. i hate them with every fiber of my being and wish them nothing but the worst. stupid baseball fans, a park that smells like piss and unlimited frustration. couldn't happen to a nicer organization.
CAREER YEARS for jake arrieta, anthony rizzo, carlos rodon and justin grim. do you honestly think they'll all be that good next year?
does anyone still think kyle schwarber is a left fielder? he proved beyond a shadow of a doubt that he belongs in the american league where his defensive buffoonery will be hidden by being the designated hitter on a permanent basis. he's not playing third or first on this team and he's way too awkward to be a full time catcher. soooooooooo, hello american league.
twelve players become unrestricted free agents including austin jackson, dexter fowler, chris denorfia, clayton richards and trevor cahill. they're in dire need of bullpen help and they lack pitching in the minors so it's time to play 'let's make a deal' with some of their prospects.
they obviously need a stud starter and those available are free agent pitchers david price, zach greinke (who's really pissed that kershaw got the ball instead of him in game 1 against the mets) jordan zimmerman and yovani gallardo. if you want to play with the big boys, you'll need 200-250 million for david price but after blowing 155 on 12-10 jon lester, the cubs might think twice.
good riddance to the 2015 cubs. and kiss my ass.
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