every year i get an almost macabre kick out of watching the cubs fail and their fans wallow in the disappointment that i'm sure will continue to follow them for the rest of my time on earth.
i've spoken and written many times about the nauseating sense of entitlement displayed by cub fans year after year ("it's our turn") and their pre-school pep songs (go, cubs, go) and their ridiculous attire, from blinking lights on their floppy hats to turtle neck dickeys, not to mention that obnoxious "W" flag that has now been transferred to items of clothing, bumper stickers and even table cloths. most cub fans have no idea that the "w" is to be displayed when they win and nowhere in sight when they lose. but i digress.
the last two years have been very difficult for me as the cubs actually navigated the regular season successfully and amplified the fan giddiness as they headed into the playoffs with delusions of grandeur and visions of world series trophys dancing in their heads. it was no fun during the regular season for me as they climbed the mini-mountain and captured their division and i had to listen to all the huzzahs that emanated from wrigleyville as the faithful made their travel plans to los angeles, phoenix and points beyond for the post season wipeout that was sure to occur. after all, they were heavily favored both years.
i even heard fans talking about risking the $75 cancellation fee as they booked multiple flights into american league cities the last ten days of october for the series but thankfully, the cubs have never even sniffed late october and the drought that has now spanned two centuries has produced incredible chokes, collapses and fan disappointment.
this year the cubs were favored by everyone from las vegas to new york to make or win the world series. they were loaded for bear and nothing could derail this express train to october and the central division crown was a 'gimme.'. but the collapse i was waiting for finally happened the past couple of weeks as, following an august disaster, the team has erupted in a firestorm of finger pointing, racial accusations, choking and fan displeasure. how sweet was it that i saw hundreds of empty seats the other night against the nationals as the fans realize that once again, it's over ....and this time, it's going to be over for a long, long time.
bad contracts, bad players, no chemistry, no guts and way too many holes in the lineup have doomed this team and the new owner has no chance to be successful unless he eats about $200 million in contracts and even then, he will have to start from scratch and he'll have no money left. i suggest cub fans take a close look at the ownership history of pittsburgh and kansas city because that's where it's going.
couldn't happen to a nicer bunch of people.
Sunday, August 30, 2009
Monday, August 24, 2009
CUB FANS ATTACK (and are beaten down)
it's almost a guarantee that you get angry e-mail responses when you pronounce the cubs d.o.a. and after reading them, my response is always based on facts and figures, not smarmy north side emotion.
why is it all cub fans have a second helping of the kool-aid they first tasted in spring training? i can understand the first cup of enthusiasm but there is no reason to drink the second because it has to be sour by now. really bitter.
here are the facts, cub fans. if you don't understand them, please contact someone who understands the game to explain it to you. there are many of those people about eight miles south of wrigley field.
the cubs are behind 4 teams for the wild card and 8 games behind the cardinals in the central division who have carpenter, wainwright, pinero and now smoltz. add that to the league mvp and 4 more regulars hitting around .300 AND maybe the best closer in the national league and you are looking at a HUGE mountain to climb. "but we still have time" lamented one cub fan.
oh really? well, if the cards go 18-18, the cubs need 29-11 to tie. when's the last time the cubs played .725 winning baseball? we ALL know the answer to that.
the cubs have no emotion, no integrity, a shattered locker room that is begging to be cleaned out and a manager who has lost the team for a variety of reasons. i had one fan contact me and his plaintif wail was "wait until mid-september and then we'll check the standings." trust me, there's no reason to wait three more weeks. it's over.
but just for fun, let's set the cardinal magic number at 18 wins starting today and we'll see if i'm right. the cardinals have 21 remaining home games where they've played .600 ball ALL YEAR. ring up 13 wins and that leaves them needing just 5 road wins and they play 12 of their 15 road games against the likes of pittsburgh, cincinnati, houston and milwaukee. p.s. the cardinals also play .545 winning baseball on the road. and remember the final poison cookie to go with your kool-aid. for every extra game the cards win over 18, so must the cubs.
the only thing i can guarantee right now about the cubs is that they will be asking their season ticket holders for playoff money any day now.........
why is it all cub fans have a second helping of the kool-aid they first tasted in spring training? i can understand the first cup of enthusiasm but there is no reason to drink the second because it has to be sour by now. really bitter.
here are the facts, cub fans. if you don't understand them, please contact someone who understands the game to explain it to you. there are many of those people about eight miles south of wrigley field.
the cubs are behind 4 teams for the wild card and 8 games behind the cardinals in the central division who have carpenter, wainwright, pinero and now smoltz. add that to the league mvp and 4 more regulars hitting around .300 AND maybe the best closer in the national league and you are looking at a HUGE mountain to climb. "but we still have time" lamented one cub fan.
oh really? well, if the cards go 18-18, the cubs need 29-11 to tie. when's the last time the cubs played .725 winning baseball? we ALL know the answer to that.
the cubs have no emotion, no integrity, a shattered locker room that is begging to be cleaned out and a manager who has lost the team for a variety of reasons. i had one fan contact me and his plaintif wail was "wait until mid-september and then we'll check the standings." trust me, there's no reason to wait three more weeks. it's over.
but just for fun, let's set the cardinal magic number at 18 wins starting today and we'll see if i'm right. the cardinals have 21 remaining home games where they've played .600 ball ALL YEAR. ring up 13 wins and that leaves them needing just 5 road wins and they play 12 of their 15 road games against the likes of pittsburgh, cincinnati, houston and milwaukee. p.s. the cardinals also play .545 winning baseball on the road. and remember the final poison cookie to go with your kool-aid. for every extra game the cards win over 18, so must the cubs.
the only thing i can guarantee right now about the cubs is that they will be asking their season ticket holders for playoff money any day now.........
Sunday, August 23, 2009
CUBS WELCOME NEW OWNER BY SAYING GOOD-BYE TO 2009
i really don't know what to say. they were the odds-on favorites to walk away with the central division and then they make a GREAT trade but ONCE AGAIN, the only thing this jerkoff team is going to win is 'underachievers of the year.'
tom ricketts has purchased a stagnant and mediocre team that over the last two weeks has taken itself out of the running for both the central division AND the wild card by simply going thru the motions while boo-boo lou struggles to stay aware and awake thru the 5th inning. mr. ricketts, i wish you well because anyone who spends 845 million for this steaming piece of crap is going to need a little luck. a few suggestions:
1) obviously, money is not an issue at the current time and it will help your sanity immensely by ridding the ball club of ALFONSO 'don't try and coach me' SORIANO, MILTON ' i'll do it my way, thank you' BRADLEY, KOSUKE 'i never saw a pitch i didn't like' FUKEDOME, CARLOS 'why would i want to get in shape' ZAMBRANO and LOU 'wake me when it's over' PINIELLA. yes, it will cost a lot but you have no chance of winning with these morons on the roster. then have JIM HENDRY drive lou to the airport and join him down at the florida retirement home. the last productive moves he made were in 2003 when he hoodwinked the pirates but he has been in suspended animation since that year.
2) clean up that urine smelling ball park. update the bathrooms and get some decent food in the park. while a supposed landmark, it truly is an embarrassment to organized sports and the city of chicago. or better yet, just knock it down and build a new stadium out in the suburbs. cubs fans have nothing better to do than wait anyhow. it's their strong point.
3) back up the truck and start from scratch. get rid of the dope smoking overweight catcher, the 4-eyed 'closer' from florida, the set-up man whose strong point is making faces on the mound and the third basemen who NEVER shows up when you need him. this will purge urine park of 8 malcontents and 2 inept administrators and give you a chance to bring up the jake foxes and sam fulds of the world who play because they love the game. you may not win the big one with them but what have you won to date anyway? at least the fans would get their money's worth and you would have players that give 100%....everyday. what a concept.
now cub fans, it's time to turn your attention to the bears and jay cutler. that team has a chance to make some noise and stay in contention the entire year. so put away your turtleneck dickeys and your obnoxious 'W' flags and let mr. ricketts clean house as he should. R.I.P. 2009
tom ricketts has purchased a stagnant and mediocre team that over the last two weeks has taken itself out of the running for both the central division AND the wild card by simply going thru the motions while boo-boo lou struggles to stay aware and awake thru the 5th inning. mr. ricketts, i wish you well because anyone who spends 845 million for this steaming piece of crap is going to need a little luck. a few suggestions:
1) obviously, money is not an issue at the current time and it will help your sanity immensely by ridding the ball club of ALFONSO 'don't try and coach me' SORIANO, MILTON ' i'll do it my way, thank you' BRADLEY, KOSUKE 'i never saw a pitch i didn't like' FUKEDOME, CARLOS 'why would i want to get in shape' ZAMBRANO and LOU 'wake me when it's over' PINIELLA. yes, it will cost a lot but you have no chance of winning with these morons on the roster. then have JIM HENDRY drive lou to the airport and join him down at the florida retirement home. the last productive moves he made were in 2003 when he hoodwinked the pirates but he has been in suspended animation since that year.
2) clean up that urine smelling ball park. update the bathrooms and get some decent food in the park. while a supposed landmark, it truly is an embarrassment to organized sports and the city of chicago. or better yet, just knock it down and build a new stadium out in the suburbs. cubs fans have nothing better to do than wait anyhow. it's their strong point.
3) back up the truck and start from scratch. get rid of the dope smoking overweight catcher, the 4-eyed 'closer' from florida, the set-up man whose strong point is making faces on the mound and the third basemen who NEVER shows up when you need him. this will purge urine park of 8 malcontents and 2 inept administrators and give you a chance to bring up the jake foxes and sam fulds of the world who play because they love the game. you may not win the big one with them but what have you won to date anyway? at least the fans would get their money's worth and you would have players that give 100%....everyday. what a concept.
now cub fans, it's time to turn your attention to the bears and jay cutler. that team has a chance to make some noise and stay in contention the entire year. so put away your turtleneck dickeys and your obnoxious 'W' flags and let mr. ricketts clean house as he should. R.I.P. 2009
Wednesday, August 12, 2009
LOU SINKS TO NEW LEVEL AS HE SLEEPS AWAY # 8
boo-boo lou punched his ticket out of town last night by giving away his eighth game this season when he ignored, or slept thru, 'managing 101' by not having a left-hander warmed up in the bullpen in the eighth inning of a 2-2 game.
REMEMBER two weeks ago when i wrote the cubs had taken control of the division when they obtained not one, but TWO left-handers and their bullpen was now a strong point?
well, idiot lou apparently forgot the phillies had THREE left-handers coming up in the 8th inning and let the incredibly incompetent right-handed carlos marmol face all of them before finally realizing that it was time to warm up a left hander. too late. marmol walks three batters and eventually forces in a run which negates milton bradley's 9th inning heroics and the cubs give one away in the 12th inning, 4-3.
LOU SHOULD BE FIRED AND BENCH COACH ALAN TRAMMEL SHOULD ALSO BE WHACKED FOR NOT WAKING LOU UP IN TIME AND LARRY ROTHSCHILD SHOULD BE DELETED BECAUSE HE KEEPS TELLING LOU THAT MARMOL IS OK.
how can you continue to root for this team?
REMEMBER two weeks ago when i wrote the cubs had taken control of the division when they obtained not one, but TWO left-handers and their bullpen was now a strong point?
well, idiot lou apparently forgot the phillies had THREE left-handers coming up in the 8th inning and let the incredibly incompetent right-handed carlos marmol face all of them before finally realizing that it was time to warm up a left hander. too late. marmol walks three batters and eventually forces in a run which negates milton bradley's 9th inning heroics and the cubs give one away in the 12th inning, 4-3.
LOU SHOULD BE FIRED AND BENCH COACH ALAN TRAMMEL SHOULD ALSO BE WHACKED FOR NOT WAKING LOU UP IN TIME AND LARRY ROTHSCHILD SHOULD BE DELETED BECAUSE HE KEEPS TELLING LOU THAT MARMOL IS OK.
how can you continue to root for this team?
Tuesday, August 4, 2009
LOU GETS #7 IN JUST TWO PITCHES!
BOO-BOO LOU lost his 7th game sunday night and it will take you more time to read these seven lines of type than it did for the cubs to lose in the 9th inning.
LOU! the average closer throws 12 pitches. when your closer throws 38 pitches on saturday, you DON'T USE HIM ON SUNDAY!
remember this equation.....dead arm = 2 pitches = 2 home runs = game over.
they're in a dog fight for the division title and his decisions have now cost the cubs seven games.
alan trammel, anyone?
LOU! the average closer throws 12 pitches. when your closer throws 38 pitches on saturday, you DON'T USE HIM ON SUNDAY!
remember this equation.....dead arm = 2 pitches = 2 home runs = game over.
they're in a dog fight for the division title and his decisions have now cost the cubs seven games.
alan trammel, anyone?
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